This week marked my 22nd birthday, and 5 years since I started college after leaving school.
I had the best ever time at college and I look back at it with fond memories of great friends, independence and general freedom to do what I wanted (for those who don’t know, I left home to live in Bristol with N for my college years).
And then there are the school years.
I’d like to preface this by saying that my school experience was by no means terrible; I wasn’t bullied, I wasn’t traumatised, and I know there’s a limit to how much I really can complain because at the end of the day, I went to a fairly sheltered private school where I did have some good friends.
It’s not necessarily my school that I have an issue with; I suppose it’s the secondary education system in general. As a creative, introverted control freak with authority issues I probably would have hated wherever I went tbh.
Below are some things that my secondary school years taught me, because for some reason I felt the need to get this off my chest:
1. Standing out is bad, fitting in is good
As with many British schools, mine was extremely strict with their uniform policy – to ridiculous levels, in fact. Whilst I understand the principle of a uniform to stop children competing with fashion (only just though; schools in other countries seem to cope with it just fine), it baffles me in other ways.
Especially when the uniform is strictly skirts for girls.
Yes, there was some mythical option that we could wear grey, ‘boys’ trousers if we really wanted to, but no one dared to do it for fear of standing out. The one or two girls who tried it were basically socially extradited for the rest of the year.
2. You’re only a real human with thoughts and feelings once you turn 18
The way teachers used to talk to us and treat us makes me shudder; and I became most aware of this in my final year age 16. Being looked down upon in any way at all gave me all kinds of defensive/rebellious feelings – in a ‘you push me I push back harder’ kind of way.
Somehow I managed to skate through all 5 years without a detention, but if I’d have stayed there a second longer it may have pushed me too hard.
3. How we appear to others is more important than our education
Think about it for a second: as young girls we were taught that if our skirt was too short or we were wearing the wrong type of shirt or shoes with too much heel, our clothing would be deemed ‘inappropriate and distracting for boys’ and we would be sent home and miss out on school.
If that’s not totally backwards, I don’t know what is.
4. Creativity isn’t as valuable as academic or sporting achievements
Many of you reading this are probably bloggers/photographers/creatives so I’m sure you will relate to this. Our passions and abilities were either ignored and not celebrated, or completely discouraged because ‘you won’t be able to get a job’ in what you enjoy.
Funny since I’m sat here right now doing just that and it really wasn’t that difficult in the end.
5. Entrepreneurship is too unachievable and risky
On a similar note, apparently starting a business wasn’t a ‘thing’ that was actually possible. Any early indicators of an entrepreneurial individual, such as confidence and innovation, were seen as annoying and didn’t fit into the ‘get your head down, do your homework, go to uni and get a good job’ mentality.
Also I tried several times to start little businesses in school and I was actively told to stop because it would be distracting to my education and also I wasn’t allowed to take money off other students.
6. You should never question rules or the way things are done
Any genuine interest in ‘why’ we do a certain thing or ‘why’ there is a certain rule was either met with an irritating adult “Just because!” or a snappy “Don’t talk back to me!”. Looking back I know that those teachers probably didn’t know the answers themselves, and didn’t have the thought to question it.
Anyway, I’m sure we can all agree that the education system is not ideal, and even ridiculous at times, so I’m sure none of this is news to you. But I had to write it because it’s something I’ve been thinking about over the past few weeks!
What did school teach you? Good or bad!
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Interesting post, I like it – absolutely agree with all these, particularly 2 and 3! I thought (still think) the uniform rules are ridiculously implemented – our school often had a habit of either going full force in this; girls getting sent home for the most ridiculous of things, or didn’t give much of a shit at all!
I also agree with your point on entrepreneurship – another student in my year had a very successful cookie business in year 9! We all depended on him for our sugar fix, and it showed a great skill of money handling and entrepreneurship, but bless him, he got in loads of trouble each time he tried to do it!
Josie
JosieVictoriaa
Thanks for your comment Josie – glad you agree and it’s not just my bitterness! :)
I just can’t get my head around the uniform thing. Schools in Europe seem to cope without all that crap, so why can’t our schools??
x
Exactly!
Yes to ALL of this. My school was lovely and we didn’t have uniform (I grew up abroad though where uniform isn’t a thing) and we never really noticed. But the whole “creative people aren’t as good as science people” was VERY apparent to me. I hated the fact that I struggled with maths but loved to draw because it sort of meant that I was doomed. Starting a business wasn’t even brought up. Or if it was, it was ever brought up with me in mind or in my vicinity. It saddens me to think that.
It’s shocking isn’t it? From my experience and networking with people and getting involved in online communities – owning a business is pretty much the best way to earn good money, and yet school doesn’t even brush upon it! Xx
I went to Mullion School and I definitely remember that skirt thing. I loved school though overall. I do know what you mean about enterprise being discouraged – unless it was school-organized enterprise of course.
That’s very interesting post and I really feel for you and your bad experience at school. I am from Poland and we didn’t have to wear uniform. I knew some schools abroad have it, as I’ve seen it the movies. In fact I was dreaming of being in school like that for simple reason you mentioned. I grew up in a poor family who couldn’t afford much and I was always standing out at school. Kids were mad about wearing fashionable clothes and branded shoes. Everything I was wearing was second hand (some of it was probably brought from UK 😌). I remember myself standing on the corridor and other kids starring at me, wearing pink cord fabric trousers. I felt really awful(even though I liked wearing them).
It’s interesting how one thing can be taken in 2 different ways. That’s just shows that system is not perfect anywhere you go.
Now I have teenage daughter who’s at secondary school here in Cornwall and I must say when I see some young girls who pull their skirts up so it just about covers their bottom it makes me feel really sorry that this is the way they want to get attention. And I can assure you that uniform policy is not that strict anymore, it’s still written but no one says anything about skirt length and I’ve seen examples of inadequate uniform being worn inside school not just outside (I know some girls make their skirts look shorter just as they get out of the school premises! 🙈) So that just shows there should be balance in everything.
As for creativity I believe that schools making more room for that now and in fact they are encouraging young people to think of their own ideas for anything. Curriculum is more demanding every year and perhaps this is somehow creating boundaries of how much time you have spare to work on your creativity and can be unfair for those who struggle to keep up with some subjects. For example my daughter was told she can’t do Computing for her exams due to get Maths performance 😏.
Again… Comparing UK educational system to Polish one. Well it’s another thing that I prefer more here than back in Poland. It’s too much to write about this on here but to cut it short…. When I was at school everything was about books, texts, remembering things not actually understanding it and so on…
Perhaps this is why I appreciate way of education in UK, both primary (I have 2 kids in primary school) and secondary.
I won’t even say about issues with bullying back at schools in Poland 🙄
I totally appreciate your experience and thinking about my own too, I believe that even though this system is not perfect and never will be, there are some improvements since we were at school and I am happy that most kids don’t have bad time at school.